Self-Awareness

Starting over, a brand new future ahead!

Endings are good, a blessing in disguise.

You may think, ‘I have heard people say that all the time, same old bullshit!’ And I totally get this may sound quite redundant nowadays. However, I have experienced it myself many times and… I am about to start over again. Yes, again! Let me share with you a few private life events so you can grasp the whole picture and understand that endings are not final or do not represent dead ends at all.

Background

At the age of 25, I lost my father to cancer after a five-year fight. This in itself was tragic enough, but my mother and I had to face drastic changes in our everyday life due to a severe drop in our finances as well. My grand-mother had died 9 months earlier, so we had to deal with two inheritance processes at once whilst being in excruciating pain. I thought at the time that we would never overcome either the dreary financial situation or the loss of my father. I must admit that I have learnt to deal with my father’s absence but I have never grieved properly, if such a thing exists.

It was a very dark and harsh time in my life; it took me quite a long time to bounce back but I finally did! Death taught me a lot about moments of happiness we are all lucky to have and how to enjoy them with gratitude. There was light after darkness, as intense and bright as the misery was gloomy. I got a job as a real estate manager, then decided to quit to do what I had always wanted to do — translating. A few years later, I met my then soon-to-be husband and we moved to London, my adoptive city I am so in love with.

Divorcing

In the meantime I lost many loved ones to cancer, I had to face it over and over again, but this helped me learn a great deal about dignity and life. After 14 years of marriage, my husband and I took different directions and we filed for divorce. Another rough time! Even though I had initiated it, ending a marriage is really hard and you must question your role in it as well. He was, and probably still is, a good and clever man and husband, but our perspectives and core values could not match any longer unfortunately. It needed to end. I promised myself at the time that I would stay happily single for a very very long time. Yet I met a tall, stubborn and absolutely charming guy nearly a year later and I fell completely in love with him! I started over again and truly believed in it… we live happily together.

Divorcing took a heavy toll on my finances as well. I could not have the same comfortable way of life. I had to change my habits while trying hard to keep the core ones, necessary to my wellbeing. Prioritizing is still challenging to me, but I feel proud of it — improving, getting a better self-knowledge, being well surrounded and setting the right boundaries are all part of a ‘must-do-to-feel-good’ process.

Professional path

And job-wise? Well, I had set up my own company specialized in bespoke private events in London, which I had to dissolve after my divorce. I started over as a property consultant, then branch manager, and I did well, but deep down inside I am truly a freelancer/entrepreneur and I needed an activity which could match my strong interests as well as the various courses I have attended so far — foreign languages, psychodynamic and Jungian therapy, interior design. And so here I am, starting over again as a personal development and business coach! Those are my passions — as well as dance. As you may have guessed, writing is undoubtedly another passion of mine.

Starting over may feel and sound scary at first, but if you approach it the right way with the right mindset, it is truly a blessing. It is also exciting. You surely never know what the future has in store for you but it may turn out to be even better than what you have experienced so far. Taking risks may be frightening but may also open great new doors you have no idea about right now and you will be proud of yourself and of the way you have taken control of your life and future. You will give yourself a new chance at happiness!


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